Local Magician's Disappearing Act Too Effective, Family Files Missing Persons Report

Amateur illusionist Dennis Presto has been reported missing after performing a disappearing act at the Elks Lodge on January 14 from which he has not yet reappeared, a duration that his wife describes as 'concerning' and his audience describes as 'the most committed performance we've ever seen.' Presto, 43, entered a custom-built vanishing cabinet during the second act of his monthly show, 'An Evening of Impossible Things,' and was expected to reappear approximately twelve seconds later through a trapdoor in the stage floor. Twenty-one days have elapsed, and the trapdoor remains undisturbed. 'He's done this trick a hundred times,' said wife Marla Presto. 'He gets in the cabinet, drops through the false bottom, crawls under the stage, and pops up in the back of the room. The whole thing takes maybe thirty seconds. It has been three weeks. Something has gone wrong.' The audience of 74 Elks Lodge members has been notably less alarmed. 'This is clearly an extended illusion,' said attendee Harold Vickers, who has returned to the lodge every evening since the performance. 'The longer he waits, the more impressive the reveal will be. I've been telling everyone — you have to see this guy.' Police have conducted a search of the lodge, including the under-stage crawl space, and found 'no evidence of Mr. Presto or his whereabouts,' according to Sergeant Paula Houdini of the local PD. They did find a top hat, a spring-loaded bouquet, and what appears to be a false thumb. The International Brotherhood of Magicians has offered to send a representative to examine the cabinet, noting that 'while dedication to the craft is admirable, three weeks exceeds the recommended duration for any standard vanish.' Marla Presto has posted flyers around town. The audience has started a GoFundMe to hire a better venue for the reappearance, 'whenever he decides the time is right.'